a moment in your arms became the reason why

[ bondfire: 10-23-06 photo by me ]

as i mentioned in the previous blog, this has been the first time in months that i am happy. and i'm not talking about a temporary happy for the moment, or the happy because of something special. i have survived the drowning waters. i am a living proof, that in time, you can conquer your existance as it is. you can make something of yourself. i just needed a little confidence. so here it is 2nd semester....a 2nd chance to make this year something i will truly never forget. no more plastured fake smiles, this is the real deal. I have spent months searching for what it is that was missing, and what was missing was....me. i know this may sound extreme, but only if you truly know who i am,or what i have gone through, are you able to understand this blog entry.

no more hiding, no more escaping. here i stand, take it or leave it. i felt the silence, no help was given. i had to figure this all out by myself. i felt as if i was in a crowded room screaming at the top of my lungs and no one heard me. dramatic? yes because it was. i've never experienced any out of body situation like that.

for now:

my father: is my father. calling me, sending me messages, checking up on my life, taking an interest. only took him 10 years to figure it out, but better late then never. i have prayed for us to finally have something in common and be able to have a father-daughter relationship. i was a daddy's girl, and it was lost for far too long.

my friends: just when you think your alone, they prove you wrong. i don't care about who i hang out with, as long as you have a good time, does it really matter? i loooove meeting and hanging out with new people. i may have many aquantinces, but i do have a small group of friends that i know will always, always be there for me. i'm here for them too. without knowledge of it, some of them have really helped me, but all in their own unique way.

just when you think your running in place, suddenly all the pieces start coming together.

conlusion: welcome back heather. its great to see you again.

i had a great weekend, and there are plenty more where that came from.