there is beauty in the breakdown

"Unrequited love is love that is not reciprocated, even though reciprocation is usually deeply desired"
i'm pretty sure there are many of us who have been victims of this. if not love...at least like. it is the cruelest of all evils. Its as if someone has put a spell on you...and in an instant you would drop everything and change your whole day to work around your infatuation. I think this is weak...yet at a point in time i think i may have been a victim of this destruction. no...i know i was. it makes you feel worthless and pitiful. You kick yourself for being entranced over and over again because when you come out on the other side..your still alone. there are so many people in your life..yet you worry about one.
sad? maybe
wierd? possibly
painful? absolutely.
so your probably wondering why i'm writing about this..because no worries..i am under NO spell right now but from observation... i feel like it pertains to my last blog entry a tad bit. its called "letting go". 2 of the most difficult words to express. we all say that we wont do that bad habit anymore...yet we always do. thats simple enough...then there are the people. now whats interesting about this "unrequited love" is that despite how much that person may have hurt you, used you , and abused you....its always so easy to go back. you like having them there...because without them in your life you feel as if you serve no purpose and you still have those feelings for them whether they are returned or not.
am i getting too deep for anyone? this is the bold truth most people refuse to see. i've never realized how awful this really is. and what is worse are the ones who hold the hearts of another in their fragile hands...and all they do is crush it. and it makes you wonder how its so easy for them to do. for you to stand there out in the open and vulnerable...and they have no trouble running you over.

and there you lay...feeling smaller than ever.


ok..so haha there is food for thought. i hope none of us are ever victims of this cruelity, and those of you who hold the hearts of another..be gentle..its a fragile object.